Where do you get tickets?

I was accosted by my young neighbour (I do have an old one as well!) in the street yesterday asked me (as if I should know) where to get tickets for Saturdays fireworks display. She had looked on the interweb and found it was happening, but not how to buy tickets before the event - cheaper apparently - she popped into the Council Offices - pushing past burly policemen on the way- and they knew nuffin.

I suggested finding one of the fly posters along the main road and reading it or going to the library (opening hours?).

That got us talking about how she was 'up norf' last week and they had a cunning scheme where the warden pounces on unsuspecting dog walkers who pick up their dogs dodo, take a name and address to go into a monthly draw for a small prize - likewise those who don't, get a monetary fine (to pay for the prize?). I naturally suggested that our town warden might do something similar (are you lot listening?) only for a passer-by to comment he couldn't do that as he never gets out of his van (worst thing I ever did, but that's democracy for you), the police just drive up and down the lane so they miss most things.

Why do these people accost me?

Hang on, the door bells going.

It looks like a couple of white coated persons at the door,

They are shouting thru the letter box that they have finally caught up with me.

Before the jacket goes on:

Citizens membership form http://bca.berko.org.uk or www.bcacitizen.org.uk

I'll be somewhere near http://norman.berko.org.uk

Apparently http://berko.boardhost.com/ might be worth visititing.

I'll go and let them in - hel.............................................